Judgement Hides in Many Guises

judgement hides in many guisesReading a poem by Brian Bilston about how he felt when offered a free copy of the Daily Mail, made me realise how judgement hides in many guises.

The comments following the humorous poem mostly appeared to stand in the strongly dislike the Daily Mail camp. Opinions on a newspaper that were shared by many of the commenters.

Luckily we live where everyone has the right to express their opinions.

I wondered what it was about the Daily Mail’s way of expressing their news, that caused such strong reactions.

Truthfully, all newspapers appear similar to me, so I guess people read what resonates the strongest with their own views. Like attracts like doesn’t it. You pay your money and you make your choice.

It doesn’t mean you or I have to like the choices made.

It does mean we have to let it go without being judgemental.

The truth is that our opinions can make other people’s blood boil.

Sometimes, discussions can lead to changes of opinions.

Or, they can lead to the ‘I’m right, you’re wrong’ argument’s that make you angry.

Sometimes I find it hard to differentiate between opinions and being judgemental. I find I can be judgemental when, touching a raw spot something slips under my radar, hiding in one of judgements many guises.

I listen to an opinion that I disagree with. I might offer my views, hoping to tweak their thoughts to my way of thinking.

Is this a conversation or is it me slipping a little judgement into the fray?

It could be that we’ve enjoyed a great debate where we all leave with our opinions intact. Coffee, cake and great fun had by all.

And yet. A tiny piece of me might secretly believe I’m right, and their wrong.

How vainglorious of me.

If I’m casting doubt on their ability to trust their own opinions, to find their own way in the world, then I’m definitely being judgemental.

If, on the other hand, I leave having enjoyed an interesting, stimulating time, maybe wondering how, or why they’ve reached their conclusions, then maybe I’m not being judgemental but curious.

Curious is good. Judgemental not so good.

Did I leave a comment on the Brian Bilston poem?

No, I didn’t.

It did make me curious enough to explore how it raised the question of how I struggle with what’s an opinion or what’s a judgement.

This is important to my inner well-being because if I’m being judgemental I’m directing my thoughts to something that takes me away from bringing my full attention to each and every moment.

Instead I’m mentally looking for a way to either prove them wrong, or searching for a witty remark that leaves no mistaking what my views are, or I’m feeling smug because I believe my opinion is far superior to theirs.

Not a place mentally, or otherwise, I want to dwell in for too long.

And for that reason, I’m truly grateful for every comment good, bad or indifferent, that crosses my path. Thank you for helping me grow.

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